Black Sunday is nearly upon us. All of you partnered people may call it Valentine’s Day, but we single ladies (and, come to think of it, most dudes) know better. It should really be called the Holiday of Unmet Romantic Expectations.

I found an email in my inbox this morning from a hotel chain I used to frequent with an ex-boyfriend. They were promoting some mushy Valentine’s special and the subject line proclaimed breathlessly: “All You Need Is Love!!”

Actually, all I need is to unsubscribe. From those email alerts and from all this Valentine’s propaganda.

But take heart, lonelyhearts. We have a few things working in our favor this year. First, February 14 falls on a Sunday, which means the torture of office flower deliveries will be somewhat tempered by the calendar. If you don’t receive a bouquet at work on Friday the 12th, you can always tell that smug little snit in accounting your new amazing boyfriend is saving something really huge for the weekend. Or you can pick up a fragrant arrangement from Whole Foods on your way to work. Just smile mysteriously when your nosy co-worker demands to know who they’re from.

Secondly, with the Great Recession rolling on, we should also expect less blinged-out holiday hype and fewer expensive displays of affection this Valentine’s. (And if you see any, I grant you all permission to shout, “Have you no shame?!” at the top of your lungs.)

When all is said and done, Valentine’s is really just another day. You have the power to decide if it makes you happy or if it makes you want to burn Hallmark in effigy. It’s also supposed to be a day about love. So here are 10 ways to have a grand time – and love yourself – this Black Sunday:

1. Drag out the glitter sticks and glue gun and craft homemade valentines for your single girlfriends, elderly neighbors or service members. (ValentinesForTroops.com will play cupid and deliver them for you.) Busy hands make a light heart, for you and for your lucky “sweetheart(s).”

2. Four words: House Hunters International marathon. I just discovered this HGTV show and it’s pretty much porn for the domestically inclined.

3. Wine. See also: screw top.

4. The best thing about being your own woman on Valentine’s Day is that you don’t have to torture yourself with painful pumps or waste hours under a blow-dryer. Exercise your freedom from fashion! Throw on your comfiest sweatpants, your coziest hoodie and take yourself to see Valentine’s Day the movie. Eat all the popcorn and licorice you want – it’s the upside of elastic!

5. Download Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” and Taylor Swift’s “Love Story”. Commence go-girl dance party in your living room. (Note: you must wear a leotard AND cowboy hat for full effect.)

6. Instead of wallowing in heartache, get your heart pumping. It’s nearly impossible to sweat and mope at the same time. Throw on some girly gear and hit the gym. Maybe you’ll find a new muscle man for next Valentine’s.

7. Play spin-the-culinary-globe. Pick a random spot on the map and try out a new recipe from that country or region. Use the evening to expand your horizons and feed your soul.

8. Use Feb. 14 to fill out a new online dating profile. SugarDaddyForMe.com, anyone?

9. Write a letter to a close friend or family member thanking them for all the love they’ve given you over the years. A grateful heart is an open heart.

10. More wine. With a side of dark chocolate. They’re good for you!

Tell us: How are you spending Valentine’s Day this year?

Carrie Seim, Betty’s L.A. Correspondent, is a writer and comedian keeping it real in L.A., New York and @ carrieseim.com.

Source:

Carrie Seim & bettyconfidential.com